the beach

Bocci team
Originally uploaded by darenpackham.

Well I am coming home to England! This is a well earned holiday for me and one I have been looking forward to for a while. Last weekend we once again changed the boat watch rosta (shift pattern) Good news is, that I write the rosta! This meant incredibly, that I got to have the whole weekend off. Ha ha clever trick!

No hippie camping trips this weekend! We made a few calls to new friends and managed to get a ride to the beach. The cooler was packed with goodies and the sun screen in hand, we were soon in our usual spot with the usual suspects to enjoy some beach sports, the bocci ball was an international show of great incompetence but was good fun. To me this should be called ‘Pentanque’ or ‘Boule’ but hey, I am sure the Italian version is exactly the same as the French and as we are in Georgia USA we can pretty much call it what we like.

To let you know how far from planet earth we live at the moment I have to tell you a story. I was on the beach with an Australian and a Kiwi guy, throwing a rugby ball about. A bloke who was very nice about our ball landing in his spot said, “ What kind of ball is that?” ……..!?????!!! We were so surprised that we were almost offended.

“It used to be a soccer ball but our friend ran over it in his truck!”

Naked picture of Author

swim
Originally uploaded by darenpackham.

I thought that this title might increase my readership. I haved been a bit lazy lately and not written anything. Now I am having a Blog frenzie.

No need for these

Shorts
Originally uploaded by darenpackham.

When in Rome! (You must go and see the coliseum) and when you are in the hippy forest camp you simply must always swim naked!

Perfect for a swim

me
Originally uploaded by darenpackham.

An early morning swim, here the author is testing the water.

Okefenokee, like Barcombe Mills, with Aligators!

wilderness
Originally uploaded by darenpackham.

There is a place near to where I am from in Sussex, called Barcombe Mills. It is a pretty place by a river, where you can rent an open canoe and paddle peacefully up the river on summer days.

While away at my Hostel in the forest, I took the chance to visit the Okefenokee swamp. The mere name of it, makes you curious as to what it is like. I rented an open canoe and set out peacefully to enjoy the natuaral beauty and some time alone with my thoughts. I had been told by the park warden that I might see some aligators. This didn't actually bother me until. OH MY GOODNESS! and other more colourful phrases. I did see an aligator! Then I wasn't enjoying being on my own at all and my hieghtened level of concentration meant that I noticed many many aligators.
Of course I am strong and brave like bull (or mouse) and was soon wrestling them bare handed (paddling back as fast as I could and staying away from the tree lined edges.) This picture was taken minutes before I realised that stopping near to the edge could be dangerous. There was probably a gator poised to munch my left hand.

I returned with only a slight sun burn. I think I was lucky. I was wondering if the Aligators wait for people on their return journey. I guess I was done medium rare by the time I got back.

There are no Aligators at Barcome Mills and the pub there is better too.

Hippy Tendencies

Tree house
Originally uploaded by darenpackham.

I eventually arrived at the hostel in the forest and was shown to my tree house accommodation. The hostel in the forest really is in the middle of the forest and at a massive $20 a night including dinner was going to be the proper, back to nature retreat that I was hoping for.

This reminds me. When we all sit down to eat in the crew mess, on the boat , we all say, ‘Born up a tree’ (from French, Bon Apitit) I like that.

Boss Hogg got foiled by International drivers licence

Last week I had the rare experience of having a regular weekend off. That is, from Friday evening to Monday morning. This prospect filled me some excitement and as always for me, I needed to go and explore, rather than wasting this precious time away, by prancing about in a semi drunken manor, in the bars of Savannah.

So, I rented a car. Once again from the smiling miss dental hygiene and her colleague, who is amazingly, the 2nd cousin to Linda Carter AKA, Wonder Woman! What a funny thing to find out about someone while renting a car.
To look at, for sure, it was Ms Peebles (dental hygiene) who had a closer resemblance to the wonderful Ms Carter than her related colleague. One thing is for sure, Wonder Woman, would have got my joke about not wanting to rent a Peeble carrier. Sometimes it is just not worth trying to explain those kinds of jokes.

Finally I was off! With nearly 5 litres of planet choking fury beneath my right foot and a speed limit of 55mph! I was enjoying total disregard to the speed laws of the USA, while singing along to songs on the radio. A dead straight road ahead, empty of traffic in front, behind and nothing on coming . That was, until a cop car came into view. I slowed down but it was too late. The flashing blue lights were a clear indication that I was in some trouble. I pulled over and wound down my window. Waiting slightly nervously to see my enemy.

Officer “ how fast do ya think you were goin there sir”
Me “ about 55 mph” lying beautifully..
Officer “ I clocked you at 83! an this here is a 45mph zone sir”
Me “ wow!” I said, “ that is a bit fast!”
Officer “ A BIT FAST?!!!
Me “ I am not used to these big American engines, If I ever wind the old ‘metro’ up to eighty, the old girl shakes around like a Kangaroo on a pogo stick!
Officer “ Can I please have your driving licence and ve-hickle documents”
Me “ Sure” thinking, this will screw him up! as I reached for my rental document and UK drivers licence.
There was a long wait while he went back to his patrol car and I was wondering what kind of fine this would lead to.
When he returned he passed the documents through the window and said, “ There is no Fine and no court date, please slow down”
Hooray for international confusion!
I continued on my way at 55mph.

SAFUYA and other abbreviations

I kept getting e mails with BR at the bottom. I felt a bit silly having to ask Brendon what that meant. “Best Regards”, he said rolling his eyes. How lazy can you get. I thought.

“ We would like to propose bla bla bla amounting to $2million.. BR. It doesn’t seem very sincere? Then there was another abbreviation started to appear. ATB, of course after a minute or so, ping! a light goes on. All The Best. I was slowly getting the hang of this. I thought I would send a trial to Brendon, to test the water.

“ Yes Brendon, just to confirm that you will need to isolate the fire alarm system in the stabiliser room on Saturday morning, as the yard are welding in there etc, etc. CBE”. That will get him.. “CBE?” was his reply. Cheers Big Ears. We liked that, so we thought we would put that out to general circulation.We have been sending it around for a while now but no enquiries as to its meaning. This has encouraged our juvenile games and boosted our daring. SAFUYA is how Brendon and I now sign off to one another. I didn't realise that he has been putting this out to a selected circulation too…(if you have recieved a mail ending with this.. Its just a bit of fun, please don't take any offence) Still no enquiries as to the meanings, so the fun may continue.

There is a silly joke involving a guy in a bar and a woman. Man says to woman, “Why don’t you stick a feather up your arse” Lady says, “What did you say?” Man says, “ Oh My! I hope this horrible weather is going to pass” It goes on, but its not worth it..

Anyway BR CBE ATB and SAFUYA

International sneezing debate and good news for hay fever sufferers

This weekend my good friend Trish, who is from Canada was staying at my flat in Sussex, England and I was working on the boat this Sunday in Savannah Georgia. Taking the advantage of some quiet time to contact some friends, using fantastic ‘Skype’ and ‘Messenger’. On Sunday morning, I was talking to my lovely French friend, Carol, who lives on the Isle of Wight.

While Carol and I were talking, she did a little sneeze and told me in her beautiful French accent, that a sneeze was a bit like an orgasm! Later the same day I was talking to my friend, Julian, who lives in Peru. Funnily, Julian sneezed and I was reminded to ask him if he had ever heard such a thing before. He said, “ Yes mate! A sneeze is apparently 1/8th of an orgasm”
Hmm, I thought. Trying to remember if I had ever, in my life sneezed, 8 times in a row… Neither of us had, but Julian had heard of a poor girl who had not stopped sneezing for a whole year. She probably didn’t want to! He also said that he knew some male hay fever sufferers that sneezed all the time and blamed the anti histamine drugs for the drowsiness.

I am a little lonely these days, so I am off to sniff the pepper pot.

Hugh Hefner

Julie
Originally uploaded by darenpackham.

Our sustained ability to make shallow relationships with beautiful women, fills some weird need to massage our male egos. But! This has us in the enviable position of being surrounded on the beach by bikini clad beauties. We are going for a sort of Hugh Heffner style. (without gold lame thong!) To the slightly jealous onlooker this is probably a bit sad and unbelievable!

The trick to these relationships is for us, to genuinely not care for more than the lovely company. I think that, if any of us tried to develop any of these relationships into deep meaningful, overnight style relationships we would have to start sitting alone on the beach. If we believe that any of these ravishing beauties actually think of us in a romantic way, we really will be sad and the onlookers will be right!

We are making friends though, people to meet at the beach, folks who tap you on the shoulder in the bar to say hi, folks that like to dance, or meet by the park for coffee. This is all good, it helps integrate us into the local community and makes the place feel like home. Without exception, all of us here miss our real home, friends and family. So, to create the feeling of belonging is important to us. I have no doubt that when the time comes to leave, there will be one or two new friends from here, that will be added to the list of people who are greatly missed.